A War on Hair

I must have missed the declaration of war on pubic hair.   It must have happened sometime in the last decade because the amount of time, energy, money and emotion both genders spend on abolishing every hair from their genitals is astronomical.

But why do so many pick on the lowly pubic hair?  A few sociological theories suggest it has to do with cultural trends spawned by bikinis and thongs, certain hairless actors and actresses, a desire to return to childhood,  a misguided attempt at hygiene or being more attractive to a partner.  Surely we are not so susceptible to fashion trends and biases.

It is a sadly misconceived war.  Long ago surgeons figured out that shaving a body part prior to surgery actually increased rather than decreased surgical site infections.  No matter what expensive and complex weapons are used—razor blades, electric shavers, tweezers, waxing, depilatories,  electrolysis– hair always grows back and eventually wins.   In the mean time, the skin suffers the effects of the scorched battlefield.

Pubic hair removal naturally irritates and inflames the hair follicles left behind, leaving microscopic open wounds.  Rather than suffering a comparison to a bristle brush, frequent hair removal is necessary to stay smooth, causing regular irritation of the shaved or waxed area.  When that irritation is combined with the warm moist environment of the genitals, it becomes a happy culture media for some of the nastiest of bacterial pathogens, namely group A streptococcus, staphylococcus aureus and its recently mutated cousin methicillin resistant staph aureus (MRSA).   There is an increase in staph boils and abscesses, necessitating incisions to drain the infection, resulting in scarring that can be significant.   The WWU Student Health Center sees 4-5 staph abscesses weekly that require draining, not all pubic, but it is not unusual to find pustules and other hair follicle infections on shaved genitals.

Additionally, we’ve seen cellulitis (soft tissue bacterial infection without abscess) of the scrotum, labia and penis from spread of bacteria from shaving or from sexual contact with strep or staph bacteria from a partner’s skin.  This can be a very serious infection which may require hospitalization and intravenous antibiotics.

There has been research suggesting that freshly shaved pubic areas and genitals are also more vulnerable to herpes infections due to the microscopic wounds being exposed to virus carried by mouth or genitals.    This is something we’ve seen happen as well, and we are particularly concerned about how frequently oral herpes type 1 is found on testing open sores in the genital region.

Pubic hair does have a purpose,  providing cushion against friction that can cause skin abrasion and injury,  protection from bacteria and other unwanted pathogens, and is the visible result of long awaited adolescent hormones, certainly nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about.

It is time to declare a truce in the war on pubic hair, and allow it to stay right where it belongs.

It Gets Better, Dan Savage

Dan Savage is a sex columnist and organizer of the remarkable 10,000+ YouTube video “It Get’s Better” campaign to discourage gay teens who have been bullied from considering suicide.  He is just plain wrong on a point he makes in this week’s Time Magazine.

When asked in “10 Questions”

“What advice can you give a reader of TIME?”

he responds:

“We talk about love in a way that’s very unrealistic.  ‘If you’re in love, you’re not going to want to have sex with anyone else but that person.’  That’s not true.  We need to acknowledge that truth so that people don’t have to spend 40 years of marriage lying to and policing each other.”

Really, Dan? Whose truth is that? Is it the truth for hundreds of thousands of gay and lesbian monogamous couples who have lived their lifetimes together in a commitment that isn’t usually officially sanctioned by government or organized religion?  Is it the truth for heterosexual couples who live in a covenantal relationship who celebrate each additional year together without lying, being policed or needing to have sex with someone else?

Lust is human nature.  So is always wanting something different than what you have.  But giving in to those whims and desires is a slippery slope to be avoided, and those in stable loving monogamous relationships know better than to come too close to that edge.  Love doesn’t take away the want and desire for sex with others.  Love proves sex only gets better with commitment and fidelity.

It does get better with monogamy.  Try it sometime, Dan.  You might be surprised.

Mentally “Unhinged”

This week following the tragic shootings in Tucson, the media has been full of descriptions of the shooter, a former college student with symptoms of progressive mental illness, as “mentally unhinged.”

Since when did the word “unhinged” officially describe this kind of extreme behavior?  I don’t recall seeing this term in such common use in the media before and it seems an odd and relatively innocuous label to put on someone who is a mass murderer.  It seems like a way to avoid the label of mental illness altogether.  It’s like saying someone is a little “loose” instead of 100% broken.

A quick Google shows the Urban Dictionary defining “Mentally Unhinged” as “People who are a bit mentally imbalanced. Not entirely crazy…but a bit loopy.”   Sounds more like a homeless bag lady.

The Thesaurus describes “unhinged” as quite a spectrum of labels:

Definition:	demented
Synonyms:	bananas, batty, berserk, bonkers*, confused, crazed, crazy*, deranged, disturbed, insane, loopy, lunatic, mad, maniac, manic, mental*, out of one’s mind, out to lunch, touched*, unbalanced

I think journalism schools need to come up with a better way for their students to describe the evil perpetrated by a small minority of people with mental illness on society.  The media needs to not shy away from saying someone “exhibits symptoms of psychotic mental illness”.

Let’s call it what it is:  this is a man suffering from a potentially treatable disease.  Not “unhinged” –like something that would be fixed after a little elbow grease with a hammer and screw driver.

Noxious Stuff: Eat Pray Love and Vampires

I’ve really don’t understand my fellow middle aged (and somewhat younger) females.  That’s actually not a new problem for me.  I never really understood my fellow preteen girls, teenage girls, young adult women–I could go on and on.  I realize this says more about my deviation from the norm than anything else, but here’s what I am really struggling with at this moment:  what is with this swooning female fascination over Elizabeth Gilbert’s 2006 memoir “Eat, Pray, Love” which is about to become an overblown Julia Roberts movie release this week?  And while I’m at it, what is with this adult (not just adolescent) craziness over vampires, zombies and other forms of the undead??  I recall getting over my Dracula phase by the time I was fourteen, after watching too many horror movies on “Midnight Theater” on TV, feigning abject terror.

I read “Eat, Pray, Love” as part of a Creative Nonfiction Writing class, and found readers’ adulation for the author puzzling given the fact she summarily dumped a husband, finagled an advance on her unwritten travel memoir and then proceeded to live and breathe a juicy story for profit.  She’s a charming and entertaining writer, to be sure, but this is not someone I can admire for anything other than her business savvy in making lemon meringue pie out of plenty of her own rotten lemons.    I certainly don’t want to emulate her, nor would I want my daughter to see her as a role model.   Yet women in droves are attracted to this story and will pay the ticket price to see a megastar act out this fantasy on the big screen: dump what you know for the exotic potential of what you don’t know, especially when you are funding it all with money for the book you will write about the fantasies you create.  It comes around full circle because the author programmed it that way.

Here’s book reviewer Jennifer Egan’s assessment in the New York Times Book Review:

“Lacking a ballast of gravitas or grit, the book lists into the realm of magical thinking: nothing Gilbert touches seems to turn out wrong; not a single wish goes unfulfilled. What’s missing are the textures and confusion and unfinished business of real life, as if Gilbert were pushing these out of sight so as not to come off as dull or equivocal or downbeat. When, after too much lovemaking, she is stricken with a urinary tract infection, she forgoes antibiotics and allows her friend, a Balinese healer, to treat the infection with noxious herbs. “I suffered it down,” Gilbert writes. “Well, we all know how the story ends. In less than two hours I was fine, totally healed.” The same could be said about “Eat, Pray, Love”: we know how the story ends pretty much from the beginning.”

Noxious herb indeed.  Yes, Elizabeth, we are all suffering it down while you cry all the way to the bank.  No, I don’t plan to see the movie and I hope lots of folks decide to watch reruns of Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck in “Roman Holiday” in protest.  Now there’s a great fairy tale of an American journalist/opportunist who decides to do the noble thing and protect the princess rather than exploit her as he originally intended.  Instead of touring Rome on a scooter,  “Eat Pray Love” runs a Mac Truck right through our common sense.

In contrast, falling in love with vampires and werewolves is pretty typical adolescent fare.  There is something fascinating to the young female heart about the dangerous, unattainable and unapproachable, especially if at the same time you are overpowered by it.  The real thing–real life relationships where one is responsible for the decisions one makes complete with the flaws and excitement, hurts and joys– is too scary.  My particular “fantasy” sweetheart as a preteen was Superman–how much more unattainable can a romantic hero be?   On the surface, he seemed a bit safer than a blood sucking vampire or hairy werewolf–all Americana and apple pie complete with a red cape and boots for good measure.   It finally became an issue for me that he lacked a third dimension.

It was later in life that I realized who I really loved all that time was the humble, quiet and sensitive Clark Kent so I found a midwestern farm boy all my own to marry.  He really did have three dimensions, and almost thirty years later, still does.  No cape necessary, and his boots have plenty of the good earth on them.

So maybe some things never really change in the unsatisfied longings of the female heart.  If it isn’t Edward Cullen, it’s a Mr. Darcy or a Rhett Butler or now the Old Spice Guy.   What I’m wishing is that we girls and women would look in the mirror and long for the stuff of the real world,  full of real people, with all the delights that come from working through the hard times to appreciate the good times.

Who we see in the mirror must get past being an Elizabeth Gilbert or Julia Roberts wannabe, or a Bella, a Lizzy Bennett or Lois Lane.

We have seen our reflection, and she is us.

Will Work For Change

The link on the map below from the Bureau of Labor Statistics has a time lapse presentation of the more than doubling of unemployment rates since 2007.   I’m not an economist but I see the dual contribution of the private sector’s abandonment of the American worker to hire cheap overseas labor and the government’s overregulation of employers.

As an occasional farm employer, I could not believe the amount of paperwork required by the federal and state governments to report hours and payroll for a few part time summer employees (i.e. teenagers).   It is an overwhelming burden that is simply not worth it.  I want to give young people good wages for good work, encourage their efforts and provide references for their future employers.    I can only guess what a larger employer has to deal with.

Good employers are not the enemy as they treasure good employees who are ready and willing to get to work.   Employers need to be encouraged, sought after, given incentives to hire U.S. citizens, or disincentives for leaving our shores.  We owe it to the growing jobless to help them get back to work.  We all need to work for change.

Unemployment by County, from the Bureau of Labor Statistics

Brother, Can You Spare Forty One Cents?

Currently it is estimated (per the National Debt Clock Calculations found at http://www.usdebtclock.org ) that the U.S. government now borrows $.41 for every $1 it spends.  As a country we are drowning in debt-load quick sand, dooming future generations to keep up with just the interest payments.  We will soon be owned by someone other than ourselves–I think that used to be called slavery.

Both Republicans and Democrats are responsible for this, as well as those of us who vote down the middle.   It all centers on our insatiable greed for what we want, but don’t necessarily need.

The cautionary tale in this, if one can be found,  is that for at least the last two decades we have no longer been satisfied to live within our means.   We borrow for everything, whether it is an education, a home, a car, a computer, a flat screen TV, or a vacation.  Our personal debt (mortgage, credit card, etc) has sky-rocketed in parallel with the National Debt.   However, as individual citizens of the U.S. we owe twice as much on average in just our share of the National Debt than we do personally.

It is time to stop the nonsense.  We must show our children how to survive without borrowing for what they can’t afford, don’t need and their children’s children would be forced to pay for.

In this case, clearly, less now is ultimately more for everyone.